Depression and why you should NOT be a writer every day

I want to talk about taking breaks.

I'll talk a little bit more about myself first (but there'll be practical advice too so stick with it!). I'll tell you about my life for one reason: It's vital to understanding my art. In order to do this let me explain a bit about depression.

Imagine going to sleep at 9 PM and waking up ten hours later still (or perhaps already) tired. Imagine having to order food twice or three times in a row because you weren't able to face going outside/to face reality/to face other people and maybe having to speak to the cashier in at the store. That's just a short insight in what depression can be like. I don't want to bore you.

It suffices to say depression is a terrible ghost. I'd love to exorcise it but that will never truly be possible and it does sometimes affect my work. I don't have as much energy to write and I need to take breaks often during the day. I also have a day job.

In addition to having depression I'm also a perfectionist. I can't just put 'any' short story or novel out there even if it sounds good in my head or is mostly completed. If it's missing the special spark it has no place under my name.

I won't lie. I don't always do good work and sometimes it's true crap as well. I'm not always as productive as I could be (thank you reddit). But I do my best. I do as much as I can every single day, even if I know some projects won't work out.

Doing my best means - for me - also taking breaks. If you're burnt out, then the best you can do is take a break and forget those spivs trying to convince you you're not a real writer if you take a day, a week, a month, or even a year or two off. Writing is a profession as any other. Would you say a policeman isn't a policeman because he doesn't work one weekend of the month? If he takes a year off to recover? Police work is hard work and so is writing - a book or short story or anything else you pour your heart into and risk your (mental/virtual) life for. And that's what a good book should be. It should risk your reputation and challenge everything you ever believed.

You deserve to take breaks just like the coffeeshop lady eating her sandwich in the back.

And if this doesn't convince you yet then consider that: Don't want to write for a month? Ok. A lot of people will think or tell you you're not/no longer a SERIOUS WRITER (TM). I won't because that's bullshit (reasons explained above). But let's say you're no longer a writer because you dared take a break. You know what? The moment you pick up your pen or keyboard again you'll be a writer again - just like magic! Any really. I'd rather not be a writer for a year, then be one again, if that helps me stay relatively sane.

I'm not sure if this'll be of any help to anyone but I often have to give myself permission to take a break. It's not easy. I'd love to work every day the whole day and write 20 million books a year.

But it's not possible.

Depression makes writing everything even more exhausting than it is/has to be and I'm probably a lot more sensitive than others to the break-needs because of that. However - everyone needs a break every once in a while to stay healthy. So please take a break. Do it before you burn out. Do it now if you feel like your head is stuffy/about to explode.

You can still be a writer tomorrow or next month.